CoryEmail-1

-NAME
Cory guy with the beard (facial not wife beard, I’m straight) Sontag

-WHERE ARE YOU FROM?
Fort Lauderdale, FL home of retired jews, ugly strippers and money grubbing whores.

-WHAT DOES YOUR WORK CONSIST OF?
My work consists of jumping on the coattails of people on the verge of success and doing as little as possible while looking busy as a boss

-HOW DID YOU GET STARTED?
Like all my jobs I just showed up and started working, at week’s end I stuck my hand out and asked for my check.

-WHAT IS THE BEST THING ABOUT WHAT YOU DO?
At the end of the week I get paid well for doing little to no work.

-WHAT IS THE WORST THING ABOUT WHAT YOU DO?
Having to be here everyday, it’s really like prison with no lights out or ass rape, well ass rape attempts sometimes, ’cause this is Atlanta.

-IF YOU WEREN’T _________, WHAT WOULD YOU BE DOING?
Watching porn on the internet, I would be looking at playboys , THANK GOD FOR THE INTERNET

-WHAT INSPIRES YOU?
I love pictures of women peeing on each other and also my new favorite website www.hotchickspickingupdogshit.com

-WHERE DOES CREATIVITY COME FROM?
people who arrant doing shit and are always sitting around thinking, uncreative people make shit happen.

-WHO’S WORK DO YOU LOOK UP TO?
(Either currently or in the past) Jesus while I have never seen his work first hand lets be honest he did big shit, water to wine, fish for a village and walked on water he was the original David Blaine.

-WHAT DOES THE FUTURE LOOK LIKE FOR YOUR INDUSTRY?
I am waiting for the future where we all wear a one piece silver jumpsuit and food is only in pill form, but no flying cars

-WHAT CAN WE EXPECT FROM YOU NEXT?
To be thrown off a lot of blogs and out of a lot of nice places

-WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO OTHER PEOPLE IN YOUR FIELD ASPIRING TO GET TO WHERE YOU ARE TODAY?
Look like you work hard, ask everyone for ideas and steal them and finally hire people dumber then you so you always look smarter then you are

-ONE DEFINING MOMENT OF YOUR CAREER SO FAR.
This interview is by far the high point if that tells you how sad my career has been

-WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
two people asking for a discount, guy who cant set his g shock and and ESPN

Shout out to @paperfrank for the illustration